The saying, “Till death do us part,” never really lives up to what it dictates with more partners opting for divorce courts instead of living happily ever after. For those seeking to divorce when divorce is the only remaining option, such parties can choose to get divorced by seeking a divorce mediation, collaborative divorce, or litigation. These divorce methods are different from each other in these ways:
What is Divorce Mediation?
The pair who is splitting up hires a divorce mediator to help them establish a settlement agreement. The mediator doesn’t favor one party over the other, but works neutrally with both parties.
Advantages
Helps to maintain an cordial relationship with your partner even after the divorce
Children will not be caught in middle of a child custody battle in the instance you have kids
Speeds up the divorce proceedings
Less expensive
The partners make the decision and not the court
Lets two people handle the divorce in private
Disadvantages
If two people are not able to reach an agreement, some additional money and time will have been spent in the process
An inexperienced divorce mediator may be biased towards one partner
If the agreement is not drafted correctly or if legal problems arise, it can be challenged in court (which can be a problem if the mediator is not also an experienced divorce attorney)
The agreement may not be fair if one partner overpowers the other partner
What is Collaborative Divorce?
In order to avoid going to court, the separating partners can decide to go the route of collaborative divorce, which is a separate system where each party agrees to that system. By doing so, each party is represented by a collaborative divorce attorney trained in collaborative divorce. In addition, there is a financial professional involved that handles all of the financial disclosure work, and generally one or both parties also have a “divorce coach” involved, such as a therapist. In other words, there can be at least 4 professionals involved in the collaborative divorce process.
Advantages
Provides the partners with solutions to reach an amicable settlement agreement
The process is meant to resolve cases peacefully out of court
The couple divorcing are in-charge of deciding what to do with their lawyers advising them along the way
Lets partners address a variety of issues unlike in court
Disadvantages
Unlike divorce mediation where there is generally just the divorce mediator involved, the collaborative divorce process involves multiple professionals, all of which must be paid for their services. As a result, the collaborative divorce process is not necessarily a cost-effective way to resolve divorce cases compared to divorce mediation
If an agreement is not reached, the collaborative divorce attorneys will have to resign from the case and the partners will have to appoint new attorneys, as neither party can hire the same attorney
What is Litigated Divorce?
Litigated divorce is the most common divorce, as the two parties hire separate attorneys and fight in court on the issues of divorce such as child custody and the distribution of assets.
Advantages
Most common divorce procedure
Best for divorcing parties who cannot work together in resolving their disputes
The most appropriate procedure where domestic violence or abuse is involved
Disadvantages
It’s expensive and produces financial distress for the average divorcing family
If the partners have children, child custody battle could turn ugly
Often puts children in the middle of the divorce disputes and causes the most emotional damage to children
Tends to take the most time to resolve
Produces animosity, stress, and fuels further litigation
Results in court orders not worked out by the parties and which might not be as enforceable as a result
If you are located in Orange County or anywhere else in California, and are planning to get divorced, you should seek the assistance of a reliable California divorce mediator. For further information or to schedule a consultation with California Divorce Mediators, please call (949) 553-0911 or visit www.cadivorcemediators.com. California Divorce Mediators is an experienced Orange County Divorce Mediation and Family Law firm serving the Orange County and Riverside areas and neighboring counties, serving individuals, couples and families with legal issues including divorce, legal separation, spousal support, child support and child custody issues. As Orange County divorce mediators and Orange County divorce lawyers, we have the experience to help you decide if divorce mediation is a good option for you and your situation.
To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, “What is Divorce Mediation.”
When two people decide to part ways, they may not be on speaking terms with each other, but may still want an amicable settlement that can be done efficiently and quickly without the intrusion of lawyers fighting a costly battle for the rights of their clients.
Whatever your issues are with each other, you need to put them aside prior to coming to the table and proceeding with divorce mediation in Orange County, California. In order to come up with an agreement that both parties are satisfied with, communication needs to be clear, unbiased, and free of emotion (albeit sometimes easier said than done). For divorce mediation to be successful, adopt the following ways to communicate effectively:
1. Choose a Neutral Stance on Issues
When talking with a mediator, many hot button issues may come up such as child custody, who gets the house, and other financial issues. Either you can take on a stubborn and unwavering approach when addressing these issues or you can ask your partner’s input on the issue, come up with reasonable solutions, and come to an understanding agreed on by both of you.
2. Listen to Your Partner
Ask your partner to voice up their concerns first before you share your input on it. By taking turns speaking and sharing views on certain issues, the mediator can make an agreement that is fair to both parties. While your partner is speaking, be sure to keep quiet and be attentive to what they are trying to communicate. Even if you do not agree with them, do not interrupt them mid-way. When it’s your turn to speak, they may do the same.
3. Make Certain that You Fully Understand the Agreement
Neither of you want to be misunderstood while communicating your views. If your partner says something, ask them again to avoid confusion when the settlement agreement is drawn up. Remember to use a respectful tone when asking them to clarify their point. Do not jump on them about something you don’t agree with before hearing it the second time. If you give them respect, they will give you respect in return. Listen to them, ask them again, and only then agree on it.
4. Present Your Views in an Objective Manner
Just like in a court of law where someone has to provide the judge with proof to prove their client’s innocence, you need to do the same during divorce mediation. You want the issues solved rather than become bigger than they already are.
In order to do that, you need to present your views on issues objectively. Provide them with evidence to back up your claim. For instance, the issue to keep or sell the house should be dealt with by providing evidence from different real estate agents on the value of the house.
By incorporating this communication technique while negotiating with your partner on issues, you both will be able to agree on a settlement in a good-natured manner.
If you are located in Orange County or anywhere else in California, and are planning to get divorced, you should seek the assistance of a reliable California divorce mediator. For further information or to schedule a consultation with California Divorce Mediators, please call (949) 553-0911 or visit www.cadivorcemediators.com. California Divorce Mediators is an experienced Divorce Mediation and Family Law firm serving the Orange County and Riverside areas and neighboring counties, serving individuals, couples and families with legal issues including divorce, legal separation, spousal support, child support and child custody issues.
To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, “What is Divorce Mediation.”
Have you been fighting or arguing with your partner a lot lately? If your marriage is headed towards a divorce, you need to adopt an amicable way to handle this issue. Going through a divorce is not a pleasant experience for either party, as many issues hidden underneath the pain come up.
Both parties fight for property, custody of children (if they have any), and other issues conflicting their marriage. Although the two parties may be at odds with each other, a level of decorum still needs to be maintained. In order to go forward with the divorce as mature adults, people should seek the assistance of a divorce mediator to establish a settlement agreement. Prior to seeking a California divorce mediation firm, they need to understand the dos and don’ts of divorce mediation.
The Do’s of Seeking Divorce Mediation
1. Understand the Process
The California divorce mediators will explain you the mediation process in detail. During your visit, the mediator will tell you about the process for filing divorce papers and inform you the length of the process.
2. Comprehend the Role a Mediator Plays in the Divorce
Although the mediator may be a lawyer, their principal role is to help the parties negotiate with disagreements and interjecting options when asked based on what the law might be on a particular issue. Their job is to come up with a settlement agreement that both parties can agree on.
3. Differentiate between the Role of an Attorney and Mediator
The mediator’s role is not to determine what each party should keep in the divorce. Therefore, both of you can seek the assistance of an attorney after the settlement agreement has been signed, as it is your legal right to do so. Before putting your “John Hancock” on it and making it permanent, you have the option to get it reviewed by an attorney just as a precaution.
The Don’ts of Seeking Divorce Mediation
1. Refrain from Making Derogatory Remarks
Partners should avoid throwing nasty remarks at each other. You both will need to compromise on some issues while letting some issues go and coming to an understanding with each other.
2. Avoid Bringing up Past Issues
During the mediation process, old wounds may open up again such as the partner’s past cheating habits. Throughout the process, you may have a multitude of emotions running through you, which you need to keep bottled up or a compromise won’t be reached. If you are not able to refrain from lashing out at your partner, it is better to end the session and start another day with a cool head.
3. Avoid Being Difficult
In order to end the process successfully, you need to oblige to the requests of your partner and mediator. This means that you need to disclose all the assets. If you hide something and the partner finds out later, there are legal ramifications and penalties under the law that may come into play. It is better to be transparent in the divorce mediation, which will ensure honesty and trust and help foster fruitful settlement discussions.
If you are located in Orange County or anywhere else in California, and are planning to get divorced, you should seek the assistance of a reliable California divorce mediator. For further information or to schedule a consultation with California Divorce Mediators, please call (949) 553-0911 or visit www.cadivorcemediators.com. California Divorce Mediators is an experienced Divorce Mediation and Family Law firm serving the Orange County and Riverside areas and neighboring counties, serving individuals, couples and families with legal issues including divorce, legal separation, spousal support, child support and child custody issues.
To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, “What is Divorce Mediation.”
What happens when couples at a later stage in their life decide to part ways? In most cases, they don’t have young children, but they do have assets they need to divide. Also, their children will still be left shocked knowing that their parents are planning to separate after spending a lifetime together. In short, getting divorced after 50 will not be any easier than getting divorced at a younger age. Therefore, couples over the age of 50 should choose a divorce mediator to guide them through this tough time.
A Divorce Mediator Will Make Things Easier
It is safe to assume that couples over the age of 50 have had several years to work on their marriage (apart from a few exceptions). If a couple, where both partners are over the age of 50, is getting divorced, there can be a number of reasons behind it. Maybe after years of trying to work on their marriage, they finally decided to throw in the towel. Maybe one party retired and stared spending more time at home, resulting in more conflict and more arguments than usual. No matter what the reason, the divorce has to be handled in a responsible way.
Although couples over the age of 50 may not have to worry about child support, they will have to be concerned about paying long-term spousal support, division of retirement funds, and property distribution. Such matters can turn ugly if they are not dealt with in a calm and professional way, and that is why involving a professional divorce mediator is a good idea. Why spend the money that has been saved for a lifetime on court litigation when that money will be needed soon enough with the retirement years coming up in only a few years?
A Divorce Mediator Will Take Care of All the Legal Hassles
When people over the age of 50 file for divorce, the divorce mediator has to sort out through issues such as estate planning, taxes, health insurance, spousal support, division of liabilities and assets, and retirement benefits. If both or one of the partners is retired, the California divorce mediators have to deal with situations like deciding on who gives money to whom and how the assets will be divided amongst each other. Assuming that the couple has accumulated many assets over the years, dividing them can be complicated and difficult, and you need a divorce mediator to handle all the legal matters.
A Divorce Mediator Will Help You Reach a Peaceful Resolution
Whether you are in your 20s, 50s, or anywhere in between, no one wants to go through a messy divorce. Still, a lot of people are not able to handle their divorce in a mature way, mostly because they are dealing with strong emotions such as anger, depression, and heartbreak. Hiring the services of a California divorce mediation firm means that they are opting for a more peaceful dissolution of their marriage. The mediator creates a safe environment where they can communicate with each other and find out what each party wants.
Elder couples going through a divorce should seek the assistance of a California divorce mediation firm to help them reach an agreement that will not emotionally deprive them or their children. Divorce at any age is stressful and unpleasant, but going to a divorce mediator to sort out the financials can lessen the pain between two parties.
If you are located in Orange County or anywhere else in California, and are planning to get divorced, you should seek the assistance of a reliable divorce mediator. For further information or to schedule a consultation with California Divorce Mediators, please call (949) 553-0911 or visit www.cadivorcemediators.com. California Divorce Mediators is an experienced Divorce Mediation and Family Law firm serving the Orange County and Riverside areas and neighboring counties, serving individuals, couples and families with legal issues including divorce, legal separation, spousal support, child support and child custody issues.
To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, “What is Divorce Mediation.”
The saying, “Till death do us part,” never really lives up to what it dictates with more partners opting for divorce courts instead of living happily ever after. For those seeking to divorce when divorce is the only remaining option, such parties can choose to get divorced by seeking a divorce mediation, collaborative divorce, or litigation. These divorce methods are different from each other in these ways:
Gerald A. Maggio is a trained Orange County divorce mediator who has amicably resolved cases many cases out of court, as well as an experienced divorce and family law attorney. Mr. Maggio founded California Divorce Mediators in 2012 with the belief that although “not every marriage can be saved, every family can” and a mission to save families from the financial and emotional distress associated with traditional divorce litigation. California Divorce Mediators is located in Irvine, California, and serves the Orange County area and other counties in California offering divorce mediation, child custody mediation and mediation of other family law matters. 
