Love, Family & Life After Divorce

Posted by: Gerald A. Maggio, Esq.

Divorce mediation attorneys Orange County; California Divorce MediatorsThe process of divorce can be bitter more often than not. When the time comes for couples to end a relationship that they had willingly wanted to pursue, emotions can sometimes get the best out of them and lead to a hateful attitude between the spouses. For example, when a couple that has been married for a very long time separates, there is likely to be a strong sense of betrayal and disloyalty between them.

It is important for couples who are going through an Orange County divorce, or want to go through with it, to know that divorce isn’t only just between the two spouses. It has a far greater affect on a large number of people from both the families. Your divorce will determine the reactions of your family and friends. A bitter divorce that is full of mudslinging, accusations, and resentment will mean that the separation of the two families will become as bitter as the divorce itself.

There are two ways for a couple to end their marriage and seek a divorce. One is through the litigation process in courts and the other through California divorce mediation. In litigation there is always the sense of competitiveness and rivalry which, when coupled with the tensions in the divorce, can become an almost unbearable volcano of emotions. Divorce mediation, on the other hand, is considerably different.  Divorce mediation is built on the principle of cooperation and peace among the spouses.  Divorce mediators are trained to facilitate and promote harmony among the spouses and encourage them to settle their differences through discussions.

Love is an important part of one’s life. According to most poets and intellectuals, it is an expression of the human side of a person. As such, love is an important component in any couple’s life. Yet classifying love to only exist between the two spouses is unfair. Love is a feeling of admiration which during a marriage is bound to exist between the couple and their families. The sense of togetherness and oneness are all signs of mutual admiration between the couple that shows that love exists.

After divorce though, for most couples their bitter end means that the feeling of mutual respect almost seems to evaporate. How can this fate be avoided? Choosing Orange County divorce mediation will help you facilitate and experience an end to a relation that is amicable and not bitter. If the end of relationship is amicable, the mutual respect between the spouses can continue.

To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, “What is Divorce Mediation.”

Ensuring Happy Holidays for Divorced Parents and Children

Posted by: Gerald A. Maggio, Esq.

Divorce-mediation-attorneys-Orange-County; California Divorce MediatorsWhen you hear about holidays, your mind goes back to the fun filled Halloweens of the past years, the Hanukkah, Christmas, and Thanksgiving events that were loads of excitement and fun. These memories are likely to bring a smile on your face. Holidays are that time of the year that is made to be enjoyed with your family. Yet this time of the year can be a source of stress and anxiety to the divorced parents and the children of divorce who once enjoyed these festivities with both their parents but are now made to alternate between parents.

Here are a few tips for those parents that will help make the holiday period more joyful for themselves and their children.

Take a Break from the Power Struggle

Power struggles are common between divorced parents and all these ever do is increase the negativity among the parents and have a depressing effect on the children. Power struggles are likely to be initiated near holiday period and is likely to be about who gets the child at what time and distribution of their times. The good way to enjoy your holiday is taking a break from the fight, and being flexible, let your ex have the way as long as the children and you enjoy. A good fight-free start to the holiday period is usually a good omen for the rest of the holiday season.

Go Easy on the Spending

It is very normal for divorced parents to try and overcompensate to make sure their children don’t feel the changes in family. This is not the wisest thing to do. Parents who feel guilty about the problems their children have had to face because of their divorce, while it might cheer your child up then, it will give you the blues after the holiday period. It’s better to spend more time with your children instead of spending more on them.

Be Happy, Laugh

Yes, the family separation would have been painful but laughing is a good way to enjoy your holidays. Children laugh naturally, but adults tend to laugh a little less as they grow older. Let your inner child out during the festive season and have fun with you children, nothing will make your children happier than seeing you happy.

Even if the children have spent the holidays with their other parent, encourage them to share their happy experiences and laugh with them on it. Remember, kids want your approval on things and having a laugh on their fun is going to let them enjoy even more.

All these tips require no technical or financial expertise. To stay happy you need the will and the desire to stay happy, and then happiness will come. Make sure this happiness is maintained for you and your children. We hope our tips help you live a happier festive season.

To learn more about the divorce process in California and how mediation can help, please visit our page, “What is Divorce Mediation.”