Reality of Divorce - Virtual
Divorce Mediation

The Reality of Divorce

Traditional Divorce Is a Business and a Difficult Process

Divorce has evolved into a thriving $50 billion industry in the United States. However, the court system is grappling with an overwhelming number of litigants and a shortage of judicial officers, resulting in lengthy processes where trials can extend over several days, spread out across months or even years.

The truth is that divorce has become a business. When you enlist the services of an assertive attorney to represent you and “protect” your interests (which may indeed be their genuine intention), the outcome often leads to ongoing and contentious litigation in most divorce cases. This approach involves inundating the other party with extensive legal documents and requests for information, thereby driving up legal fees and costs, not to mention multiple court filings for hearings.

The divorce process has transformed into a system where some attorneys exacerbate an already volatile situation between parties who are angry with each other.  This approach significantly inflates legal expenses and further damages family relationships, which may never fully recover. In such a process, who emerges as the winner? Certainly not you or your family. Even if you triumph in a bitter courtroom battle one day, it is likely that your spouse will be emboldened to spend more money to drag you back to court in retaliation on another day.

Moreover, because the court system often fails to provide sufficient guidance on managing the emotional aspects of divorce, some spouses become entangled in the emotions and tensions associated with the process, further fueling litigation. The crucial point to understand is that both you and your spouse have the option to circumvent the court system by pursuing mediation to resolve your disputes.

Traditional Divorce is Expensive

The cost of a divorce in California can vary widely depending on various factors such as the complexity of the case, the involvement of attorneys, the need for expert evaluations, and the level of conflict between the parties. Generally, divorces in California can range from a few thousand dollars to tens of thousands of dollars or more.

According to one study, the average cost of a divorce in California with legal representation is around $17,500 per spouse., which means that the average cost per divorce per couple is an average of $35,000!   However, it’s important to note that this is an average figure and individual circumstances can significantly impact the overall cost. 

Divorce mediation offers a much more reasonable and cost-effective alternative way to resolve your disputes at a fraction of the average cost of a traditional California divorce!

How Divorce Mediation Can Save Your Family

Navigating a divorce through litigation can be an overwhelmingly expensive endeavor, even in cases with seemingly low conflict. In recent times, the price tag for divorcing couples with their own attorneys can easily soar to $35,000 or more. For those grappling with intricate issues like custody disputes, financial complexities, and the need for expert evaluations, costs can skyrocket well beyond the $100,000 mark. In many litigated divorce cases, when divorce cases make it to the courtroom, many couples have already substantially depleted their community assets, leaving debts and attorney’s fees to be paid. 

Parenting in today’s world is already a challenging and costly endeavor.  Every parent aspires to provide their children with top-tier educational opportunities, from elementary to high school. They invest in club sports and an array of activities, all geared toward securing their children’s admission into colleges. However, gaining admission to college has become an uphill battle, demanding stellar grades and exceptional accomplishments. Parents often grapple with feelings of overwhelm, sensing intense competition compared to their own upbringing and worrying they are not doing enough. On top of these concerns, many parents must navigate additional challenges such as ADHD, speech delays, social/behavioral issues, anxiety, autism, and more. These factors amplify the already demanding task of child-rearing.

Now, factor in DIVORCE. Suddenly, the conversation shifts to how the parties’ assets and income will sustain two households instead of one. Divorce’s emotional and psychological impact on children is substantial, even with parents making efforts to shield them from the process. Children must acclimate to a new life and lifestyle, a journey fraught with challenges. Their academic performance and various aspects of their lives may suffer, both overtly and subtly. Consequently, these children may find themselves trailing behind their peers from intact families.

Traditional, litigated divorce is often a court battle, a process that could span months or even years, and comes with substantial costs. The funds earmarked for legal fees will deplete family assets, retirement savings, college funds, and income. Litigating parents often accumulate significant credit card debt to cover their legal expenses. For many families, the path to financial recovery is nearly insurmountable. Once the money is gone, the looming question is: How will you support your child’s college education? While you may consider resorting to parent or student loans, the reality is that your children’s opportunities will be constrained, putting them at a disadvantage compared to children from intact families who can focus on their success instead of battling it out in court.

Families throughout California are awakening to the financial advantages of divorce mediation. While divorce can have enduring negative financial consequences, when it becomes inevitable, you and your spouse owe it to your family, children, and future to approach the situation with maturity. Engaging in mediation to resolve disputes will not only save you a substantial amount of money but also safeguard your financial future. Divorce doesn’t have to translate to limiting your children’s future or your own. It’s imperative to consider divorce mediation or custody mediation as a pragmatic alternative to litigation, where costs are significantly higher, and the outcome is beyond your control. Mediation comes at a fraction of the cost of court litigation, and choosing this path will secure your family’s financial future.